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My last 2 cents in this subject....
The worst thing a WMVM can ever do is try to initiate any type of intimacy/relationship even before he sought a visa the first time. Letter writing stages are nothing more than an introduction to each other and a 'hopeful' seeding of friendship.
Your first trip should be nothing more than to 'personalize' your association. If before you get to FSU and your tongue is dragging on the floor impatiently waiting for a chance to 'lap' your Russian bride...have fun.
I don't also subscribe to the notion of NOT making your intentions known, whether it becomes a topic of discussion or not...IMHO.
Trust me, although there is a scant minority of FSU women who is sincerely writing only to 'one', a greater majority of them are sought after, writing to, visting with, and are speaking to a heck of alot more WMs than you can ever know...in addition to RMs.
That's just life...
One things RWs are not (not all), especially the PYTs, is being as lonely and indecisive as you......
What a convoluted thread.
Just to clarify, I am WMVO, call me a romantic, dreamer or whatever, I think it's the best way to do this, for me at least. Those who can juggle dates go for it!
I'm trying to determine where you stand, are you pro WMVM, did you do this method? I thought you wrote many but only went to see your wife only?
If so, why the distaste for the WMVO crowd? :p
Wow, this debate between WMVM vs WOVO seems endless with now real right or wrong answer.
For myself, I started writing to many different ladies, and I treated it as a courtship period. When I started to feel a connection with "A" I felt it I only wanted to write to her. How the heck do you guys keep writing to so many different ladies month after month. I am envious!!. I nominate you all for the "Jack Tripper" award!! :D I used to get lost where I was after juggling 5 or 6 ladies just in the writing, I couldn't imagine trying to date them all. Ok, back to my thoughts.... After I felt a connection with "A", I only wrote to her and began to phone her. After a few months, I decided it was time to visit her, and her only. Did I have a back up plan? NO, I did not (I think a backup plan is a good idea, I just was too new and didn't think of it, oppsss). I was lucky and that we hit it off and there was a great connection. I asked "A" what she would think if she found out I was seeing someone else. Let's just say she would NOT be impressed with me.
It is a very difficult subject with no definate right or wrong answers, because every man and woman is different. My thoughts as well as my future wife's thoughts are this. I could only visit one lady, and I would only travel out to see one lady when I feel that there is a strong enough connection. The thought of juggling dates is too complex and tough for me, knowing my luck, I would call her the wrong name!! and get a slap :( I would definately have a back up plan if my one lady and I did not have a connection. My lady has told me that she would be very upset with me if she found out that I was visiting other ladies and that my "emotions" were not towards her and only her.
My lady and Lissy are very similar in their thoughts. I had to work to win her heart, and it was the greatest experience and adventure of my life. :vibes:
Just my 2cents...
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