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That study I really thought was legit.
it may be.
but it has bounced around so long now without being published or completed its starting to be suspect in my mind at least.
a few things that have always stood out to me were the statistics for men and women on the rebound.
(within one year of a seriuos relationship)
I do NOT doubt the percentages or numbers.
i just feel that if you studied ALL marriages overall, couples on the rebound would have that same failure percentage no matter the cultural or cross cultural issuie.
I have never understood why the man douing this study did not include some data that would be very enlightining.
easy example:
the number of those marraiges where one or the other person was in a rebound state.
This "could' either have no effect OR GREAT effect on the final %.
as well as a lot of other info that was certainly collected but not added in this small excerpt.
At least from my personal observations this rebound percent of individuals in this process is very very high on both sides..
I'd also like to poll the Russian women here to ask about the 85% of women enrolled in a marriage agency not having a morale issue with false DV charges
as well as the 95%? or so that know about the charges and how to file.
to me that is a bit beyond belief :::shrugs:::
but maybe thats because of the reports study group being only married or priviously married US couples?
then it doesnt reflect "RW listed with marraige agencies" because i do know for a fact that many signing up certainly at first have no clue of that DV law, as they may be thinking of an italian or german man etc..
95% is just not realistic under the studies definition?
and to exponentially carry it to that almost all RW know and
then almost all have no moral issue with that behaviuor seems incredible at best.
minor points..
but it seems after a year of being posted no answers or further statistics have come from such an in depth study.The man responcible for it has posted here before and it would be cool if he would bounce back yearly to enlighten us a bit more?
:offtopic:
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You are right, I had to travel to find it, although things were moving up before I left the UK. I think had I stayed, I would not be on this board because my path would have been different, but I am sure that I would have go my confidence up, sooner or later.
See above ;) part of the reason I turned my life around was what other people told me, although not specifically about women. I had MUCH bigger problems than just a paucity of girlfriends! In the end though we do just have to jump in the water, although sometimes we can be thrown...
Yes we have to build confidence through positive reinforcement, but going to the FSU is, IMHO not the easiest or best way to do that, although as I have previously said, this kind of board is a big help because it allows people to see what can be done. Following my footsteps would probably be a pretty bad model, look at me, not married, no engagement, loads of trips that look pretty fruitless.
For most guys going to Russia or the Ukraine is pretty much a one shot deal, with perhaps a follow up before marriage, hardly a path towards confidence building, although for some guys, this may be just enough to get them on the right life track with a woman willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, for their own reasons.
You are of course right to say that travel is quite a bit of fun, hell, it is one of the reasons that I do it, also for the challenge. Maintaining two lives is challenging and tricky, maintaining two homes in my circumstances will, at some point, I am sure test my intestinal fortitude and that which does not kill us makes us stronger!
Perhaps at the root of your comments is the thought that I am suggesting a bit of 'do as I say' not 'do as I do'. That I am saying that it is fine for me to go swanning off to the FSU, but you Yanks should stay at home. It is not really what I am getting at, for me Russia and Estonia are next door, it is similar to going from New York City to Boston or from Los Angeles to Las Vegas in terms of distance and time. Actually going to Tallinn is like travelling from one side of LA to the other in terms of distance and possibly less in terms of time... (less than 300Km to SPb and about 70Km to Tallinn) If I were in the UK I would not be doing this, nor would I be if I were in Oulu, about halfway up FInland. I have no idea where my future wife lives, I may have met her tonight, maybe last week, both prospects would not be unattractive. :D
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